Most of what I can say right now is "WTF?" And it's not all with the suprise ending ...

I shall try not to spoil anything, so here's my spoiler free part: As with all great three part installments, the first introduces character and conflict, the second shows our heroes/heroines at the lowest moment, and the third brings the conflict to its height and resolves said conflict in a usually satisfactory and reasonably cheerful manner - reference Star Wars. Pirates of the Caribbean, I think I can say, is no exception, so far, not having seen the third one. The Curse of the Black Pearl was a nice little romp, introducing us to key players, their motivations and whatnot, nice little ride, happy ending ... for most of them (Since you know I'm partial to the Commodore, he doesn't get a happy ending ... but I ramble. What ever Norrington is, or has been said to be, he is a good man, even if it's only at heart. He's human, but he's a good man). And now, we hit our low, some lower than others. And some have definitely hit bottom. The search is on for a chest, the chest of Davy Jones, because whatever's in the chest will get one person his desire - of three fighting over it. Jack Sparrow needs it to free himself from a debt. Will needs it to free him, his father, and Elizabeth. Norrington needs it to get his respect, honor, comission, and life back. And they all play dirty for it. Very dirty. Backstabbing, tripping, sneaking and cheap-shots abound. Which makes for lovely action sequences, really. But honestly. Our characters are at their lowest form, their basest motivations, and weakest moments. People who play honorably lose big time. People not on their guard lose. Only someone who plays lowest will get what s/he wants. This movie is setting up for the bonanza finish - special effects abound, swords flash, wit sparkles, the villains are spookier than the first. I'm dying to see the third, hopefully, characters will do the right thing and bring this mess to an end. As one character says - "Redemption".

*SPOILERS TO FOLLOW. DON'T READ IF YOU DON"T WANT TO HEAR SPOILERS!*

Just to get it out there - Why the hell was this movie so dark!? I wanted to cry at the beginning - the empty wedding - the rain pouring and Elizabeth waiting for Will, only for him to show up cuffed and in company of one Lord Cutler Beckett, of the East India Trading Company. Beckett is one thoroughly slimy character, his motivation through the entire movie is to get as much power as possible. In doing so, he wrecks the lives of quite a few people - Elizabeth and Will, most obviously, but also Governor Swann is stripped of his title, his influence, his position, and his wig, trying to bargain for Elizabeth's life (noble!). Not to mention Norrington, who is the third (Will + Elizabeth being the first and second) wanted for the escape of Jack Sparrow, the penalty for which *gulp* is the noose. Beckett gets Will and Elizabeth, where the heck is Norrington? Seems the chap disappeared after a disasterous chase of the Black Pearl. Anyway, Beckett imprisons Will and Elizabeth, sending Will, with the promise of a pardon for him and his beloved, to get Jack Sparrow's compass, which is revealed to point towards one's heart's desire.

Will gets to Jack, Elizabeth escapes, joins a crew, ends up in Tortuga. By which time, Governor Swann is disgraced, Jack and Co. have consulted Tia Dalma (watch the Monkey! the boots!) and Will, through some slimy actions of Jack Sparrow, is press-ganged into Davy Jones's crew and reunites with Bootstrap Bill, his father. The flogging sequence is touching, really. I wanted - ALMOST - to cry when father had to flog son. Well done. Anyway, prior to this, when trading over Will, Jack Sparrow has to hand over 100 souls instead of his, or else ... So he goes to Tortuga, and picks up a bum crew. One of the men is piss-drunk, slurring all over the place, challenging everyone to a fight, with a very funny hairdo and a costly-looking coat. Look a bit closer and this man is not your average dock rat, apart from how drunk he is. This man is ... was ... Commodore James Norrington, RN. He joins the crew, after insulting Jack and behaving in a very ... interesting manner, which leads to him being clocked over the head by Elizabeth and thrown into the pig pen.

"James, what's the world done to you?" is Elizabeth's reaction. Clearly, he's gotten fed up with being a good person - I point to the end of the 1st movie where he gives up Elizabeth's promise to marry him, and lets her, Will, and Jack walk away free, before that, presumably, removing pirates, who were, infact, murderous thieves and rapists and what-not. So he was a good person. And I can see why he thinks he's been good for nothing. The woman he loves goes with a blacksmith, the last pirate constantly eludes him, etc. After pursuing Sparrow through a hurricane where he loses his crew, he resigns his comission and lives as a drunk dockhand with almost no sign of what he was before. I feel really bad for him. Really bad.

Anyway ... later in the movie. Yeah. Here we come to the backstabbing bit.

Will's father has, to save Will, pledged his eternity to Davy Jones's, royally pissing off Will, who, despite his chivalry, courage, and all around hero-ism, I cannot find it in myself to really like, though he is a good man. Throw in a hairy experience with the Kraken or two, and "we" - Jack, Will, Norrington, Elizabeth, Pintel, Ragetti and some of Jones's crew - end up on the island. Elizabeth, Norrington and Jack dig up the chest, Will shows up with the key, and they - Will, Jack, Norrington - proceed to have at it in a wonderful three-man fight. Lots of backstabbing and dirty moves for the key to the chest - speaking of which, who's guarding the chest? Oh, look, Pintel, Ragetti, and Elizabeth are being chased around the island by the crew who want the chest. Unfortunately for them, Jack's already gotten the contents of his chest - Davy Jones's still-beating heart - which he tore out, tormented by a woman he loved but would not love him back (the lockets are a clue. Look for them!) So everyone ends up at the single lifeboat, fighting for their lives against Jones's crew. Norrington steals the letter of marque - notices something fishy - and then grabs the chest, saying the only way is if someone draws the crew off, and runs. He is caught by the crew, after saving everyone's arse, gives over the chest and gets out of there. Smart. The chest is empty, and Davy isn't too pleased.

Davy Jones goes after who he thinks to be the last man to have his heart - Jack Sparrow. Jack, who is about to pull it out for negociations, realizes, to everyone's horror, that he doesn't have the heart. Then who does? This is when the crap hits the fan. Davy Jones summons the Kraken, which proceeds to shred the Black Pearl, though the ship puts up a spirited defense, led, of course, by Will, Jack Sparrow having gone off in a rowboat. At the crucial moment, however, Jack returns and saves the Pearl. Still with me?

The crew gets into the one remaining lifeboat. Uhoh ... where's Jack? Elizabeth, in order to save her own skin, has chained Jack to the mast, knowing the Kraken is after him. This gives the remaining crew ... 5 at best ... a chance. Right. Very noble of her. No one protests, though they know she's lying when she said he decided to stay behind.

Suprise! Jack Sparrow escapes the cuffs. But it's too late. The Kraken is hungry. Jack has no choice, so goes into the belly of the beast, sword drawn. Is this the last of Captain Jack? I hope not, despite his actions.

Meanwhile, in Port Royal, an East India Trading Company ship has picked up a castaway, carrying a letter of marque. Guess who it is ... Norrington. Very pissed off, but alive. And he can finally settle his debts, clear his honor and regain his name. His bargaining chip, with Beckett? Not money. Not the compass.

Davy Jones's heart.

Norrington has done the lowest - stole when no one was looking - and, under the pretense of doing something noble, did something slimier. Escape.

Wait for the kicker, though. I realize you all don't give about Norrington, but bear with me.

Will, Elizabeth, Gibbs, Cotton, Pintel and Ragetti go back to Tia Dalma's cottage in the bayou. While mourning Jack and drinking a pint, they mention the fact they'd do anything to get him back. Tia Dalma, shockingly, says they can, but they'll have to sail to the ends of the earth. And to do that, they need a navigator. Someone who's been there before. She's already got someone lined up for the job. Just upstairs. Hey ... those boots look familiar.

*EVEN MORE SPOILERS! EVEN IF YOU READ THIS FAR, YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO READ THIS, ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE! REALLY! LAST WARNING!*

So, who's the navigator? Honestly, last man on earth you'd guess. Even after Governor Swann, Beckett, Norrington, Jack Sparrow and George W. Bush. Really and truely!

It's Barbossa! Holy crap, isn't he dead!? All I can say is - WTF? Well, he's baaaack - apple, monkey, hat and all. What the heck is going on here? How's he here? Why is he going to help them? What's Tia Dalma got to do with all this? Okay, I saw the locket on her table matched the one Davy Jones had. Obvious. Is she really Jones's tormenting sweetheart, or did she just come across it? Can we trust her? Trust Barbossa? Trust anyone after the events of the movie?

*END SPOILERS!!!*

Most importantly, will redemption come? For everyone? No one, except, maybe Beckett, does not deserve it (double negative, I know). Jack Sparrow is capable of bravery, though he is selfish - he must have a good heart. Elizabeth just wants to be with the man she loves - alive, preferably. Will wants to save her, his father, and himself. Governor Swann wants to save Elizabeth. Pintel and Ragetti just want to get on with their lives. Norrington wants his life back, after it was taken from him when he did good. Davy Jones, however despicable, is tortured by the thoughts of his past love, and, I think, wants nothing more than no more pain for himself. Barbossa has paid the price for his greed, and just wants to feel again. I'm on a role here, I'm even starting to think that Beckett isn't total despicable - though he is.

Like the sailors cowering before Davy Jones, I pray for redemption. No one's a lost cause - they all good people, at heart.